Write Me.

At the touch of love, 
Everyone becomes a poet. 

Pavement.

Grab my hand.
Pull me close.
Tell me sweet nothings and promise me things you know you could never keep.
Go ahead. Throw me to the pavement.
You've done it once you can do it twice.

Throw me down like you already have.
You say you would never do such a thing; yet here you are looking down at me.
Ha. That's funny.
Love? That doesn't exist for you. Only fools fall for that.
I guess I'm that fool.

But it's too late now.
My head is already throbbing, my hand is sore, & my back hurts from that pavement.
I have a mark now. 
A mark that reminds me.
Reminds me of everything you never were.

You say you don't know how to break someones heart,
But you have already mastered the process.
You don't need me to give you instructions. 

Happy Endings.

Happy endings and fairy tales.
Doubtful looks starred at me... oh, right; how could I forget?
Sometimes being totally screwed
can set you free or cause a nightmare.
I wasn't in the mood to explain;
to have a long conversation.
Who says there has to be a connection?
A story?
He listened carefully; I could hear his thoughts...
AH! SHUT UP!
Could he possibly live up to my expectations?
A true lover is flawed & has that one thing they can never apologize for.
He couldn't understand why and now there was curiousity.
The question could no longer be ignored.
Someone has to show their flaws.
Someone has to make this a happy ending.

Rain Drops & Patterns.

These are the poems I wrote from the newspaper.
Rain Drops
Travel
in
the
rain
with
people
determined
they'll
 start
 up
 again.

Patterns.
Continue
running
with 
no
pattern
Spring
Forward
from 
that 
firm
decline
&
jump 
in 
the 
future. 

No Warning.

It all came at once.
No one warned me. There were no signs that said STOP; your childhood is about to END.
It smacked me in the face and left a red mark.
I didn't have a four way or even a two way. It all came at once.

I tried to see if I could go back and fit in those pants that I loved so much with grass stains & trampoline scars. But I was too big; I had grown out of them. I couldn't shrink back down, I couldn't change what the years had done to me.

My little purple shoes that I wore till holes were at my big toe; could no longer travel with me. They just had to sit and gather dust.

My perfect baby doll no longer was taken care of. She just starred & sat; She use to be so much more. But now I can't make her come back to life. My powers are gone. My favorite movie seems so unreal. There is no more left in it but characters.

It all came at once and stole the music that made me creative.

Swings & Dolls.

I remember.

I remember taking the bus. I remember 6th grade wall ball & four square. I remember blisters from monkey bars & back flips off of slides. I remember my first crush and how he gave me a pen in my favorite color PINK. I remember mismatched socks and moon boots. I remember trampoline scuffs & bruised knees.

I remember not doing my hair; not caring about anyone. I remember swinging till it was dark and time for dinner. I remember having an imaginary friend. I remember playing barbies. I remember doing my dolls makeup. I remember wanting to be a Princess. I remember wearing my moms jewelry

I remember watching all my siblings getting married. I remember hating my brother for it; he just got home, how could he leave me already.

I remember seeing my dad in the hospital. I remember being scared to touch him afraid I would break him. I remember watching my mom fall, fall, fall. I remember crying and begging for her to be okay. I remember watching my brothers face fill with sorrow. I remember searching for an answer to why this would happen.  I remember feeling a glimpse of hope & His presence.

I remember dressing up as Zorro because that was me & my dads favorite show. I remember falling asleep on the couch with my head on his big round belly.

I remember almost losing a parent for the second time. I remember God; His presence; His hand holding mine. I remember that moment when I realized I need to say "I love you" more.

I remember my moms comforting words when I had a nightmare.

 I remember.

Wired.

Cover up; Hide.
You know that's all you can do.
You can't change.. You were wired this way.
No matter how hard they push and pull; you hold tighter.

It's all you can do.